Community Belonging Matters - Mental Health Awareness Week

When I was younger, I struggled to feel like I belonged outside of my family home. I often felt like I didn’t fit in, and some of the difficult experiences I went through made me believe I was unlovable. Unworthy. I struggled with attachment, and that bled into my friendships and how I navigated spaces around me. It wasn’t that people didn’t care, it was that I didn’t feel seen. I didn’t feel safe so didn't show the real me to them, a version of me to fit the group around me. The few times I shared my true self I often got rejected or was not believed,

And here’s the thing I’ve learned, through personal experience and now through years of working in child mental health: Belonging is not a luxury. It’s a need.

When a child or young person doesn’t feel a sense of belonging, whether in school, in their community, or even in their family, the impact runs deep. It affects their mental health, their ability to form relationships, their learning, and even how they see themselves in the world.

If we don’t belong, we don’t feel safe and if we don’t feel safe, we can’t thrive.

Recently, I watched a TikTok that’s stuck with me. A young person was asking other young people in Derby what they thought of the city. The answers were heart-breaking.

If young people feel this way about where they live, about their city, what does that say about the communities we’re creating for them? What does it say about how we talk about, value, and nurture our shared spaces?

Of course, Derby, like many cities, has its challenges, but it also has people doing extraordinary things, quietly and consistently. Places where children feel safe to talk. Cafés where families are offered a warm drink and a listening ear. Youth groups where being yourself is celebrated.

The problem is, we don’t amplify those spaces enough, there aren't enough of them and they aren't accessible to everyone. Young people are often seeing more of what’s broken than what’s being built, and that feeds a narrative of hopelessness. When a child feels like even their hometown has given up on them, how can we expect them to believe that they matter?

This is why the theme of this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week, “Community”, is so important.

At Bridge the Gap, we see every day how powerful community can be. Sometimes it's in a group of girls lifting each other up, sometimes it’s a drop-in chat at the Derby Cares Café. Sometimes it’s just a child being given the space to say, “I’m struggling,” and be met with kindness instead of shame.

Communities don’t have to be huge to be healing. But they do need to be intentional. They need to be places of belonging—where children know they are safe, valued, and enough.

As adults, we need to take responsibility for the environments we create and how we speak about them. The things we model, the spaces we hold, the words we use, all of these shape the stories children tell themselves about who they are and where they live.

So if we want to shift the narrative from “this place is rubbish” to “this is where I belong,” we have work to do, but I believe it’s possible. And I believe it starts with us.

Let’s build communities where children don’t just survive—they feel seen. They feel safe. They belong. Because belonging isn’t just about fitting in, it’s about knowing there’s a place where you never have to shrink who you are just to be accepted.